Tag: Brands/PR

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Because I can’t cook, but I love COOL WHIP!

All right. Those of you who know me well (actually if you know me at all this will come as no surprise) know that cooking is definitely not my strong suit. In fact, I really don’t like it much at all.

Yes, I can follow a recipe and make a perfectly edible, if not even downright tasty, meal, but I just don’t like doing it. It’s time-consuming, I don’t know how to cook without a recipe or substitute measurements or ingredients in my head, and I always say if you want to torture me, make me chop something. Plus, if you can keep a secret, I’m actually kinda lazy. There, now you know.

BUT! Continue reading “Because I can’t cook, but I love COOL WHIP!”

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A birthday wish

May your day be filled with smiles and laughter.

 

May your cake be sweet and candles bright.

 

May your dreams be fulfilled and your expectations exceeded. Continue reading “A birthday wish”

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Deck the… humbug?

As you might know, we’re not going to be at home for Christmas this year. We’ll be traveling. And although it will be a most radical trip, it’s just kind of thrown my whole holiday spirit out of whack this year.

 

I didn’t really feel like getting a Christmas tree, since I’ll probably want to have it taken down before we leave anyway. (we did end up getting one, just a tiny little guy this year. even so, i did manage to get almost all of my favorite ornaments crammed on there. but only 1 strand of lights)

 

 

I really haven’t gotten out any of our other interior decorations, save a winter scene nightlight in the hallway and our mistletoe ball in the kitchen. We have some great advent calendars that I love dearly, but even they remain in the decorations cabinet in the basement because I just didn’t feel like hanging them up this time. Oddly, I felt like the days that didn’t get put up before we left would be lonely. (i know, i’m weird. that’s nothing new) Plus D got 2 chocolate advent calendars from relatives this year, so those have sufficed and fueled her new-found sugar addiction.

 

I did wind our pre-lit garland around the front lamppost and string the real stuff from my grandparents along our porch rails, because I absolutely adore white Christmas lights outside. But the little tree lights to line the walk will have to wait for another year.

 

(please pardon the fake snow. i was just having a little picnik fun)

 

I’m not even really in the mood for presents this year either. I usually love passing out everyone’s gifts on Christmas morning and reveling in the holiday spirit, but just the thought of trying to come up with something for people is kind of grating on my nerves right now. I’m at a total loss for most everyone, and since we’re traveling I don’t really even know if we should do gifts at all. Ugh.

 

At least a lack of decorations means a little less clean up this year, right? I won’t have to traipse around come the start of the new year taking down all the festive flair and making each room seem a little less magical than when it wore its holiday best, which is always kind of depressing. And since the tree only has 1 strand of lights, I won’t have to mess with tangling and untangling all of those as I try to unwind them from said tree and get them back in storage without ending up with a giant National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation-sized knot.

 

I guess one other good thing about a pint-sized Christmas tree and minimal decorations is that most of my upkeep and cleaning this year simply consists of telling D, “We don’t touch the Christmas tree. Just wave hi to him.” And yes, that’s worked just fine so far to keep pine needles off the floor, believe it or not.

 

Anyone have a cup of holiday cheer I could borrow? Something bubbly and slightly alcoholic would do splendidly.

 

 

I’m sharing my holiday home decor (or lack thereof!) and cleaning tips for the chance to win prizes from The SITS Girls and Great Cleaners.

 

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A whole new (messy!) vocabulary

Since becoming parents, a whole slew of new words has begun populating our everyday vocabulary – breast milk, breast pump, breast any-kind-of-paraphernalia (those more so in the first months than now, but still never before D was born), diapers, wipes, butt cream (what, you used that one before you had kids? ok, then i’m the weirdo), onesie, teething, jumperoo, peekaboo!, spit-up… The list is quite lengthy, but I think you get the idea.

 

There is one word, however, that has unfortunately become more prevalent than the others. A word that has been the focal point of many a conversation and has caused load upon load upon load of laundry. Really, all from a single word? Yes really, all from a single word. What word could possibly have such an impact in its singularity, you must certainly be wondering by now? That word, my friends, would be poopsplosion. Yes, you read that correctly. Poopsplosion. As in poop-splosion. What the? May I have a definition? Absolutely!

 

poop.splo.sion [poop-sploh-zhuh’n]

noun

  • the act or instance of baby poop exploding out of a diaper and onto everything/one in sight – clothes, changing area, car seat, furniture, walls, floors, the baby, you.

Can you use it in a sentence, please? Why, surely!

 

“I picked up D only to discover her entire back and legs were covered in fecal matter due to another poopsplosion.”

 

Poopsplosion.

 

Our first encounter with this lovely word came roughly 3 weeks after D was born. And looking back on it, I’m actually quite surprised we made it that long before coming face-to-face with the dreaded poopsplosion. We had gone to my mom’s house for the better part of a week, and both my sisters and my dad came into town to meet D for the first time. It was a lovely visit, really. You know, first-time grandparents and aunts and all.

 

All went swimmingly, too, until shortly before it was time to come home. Babies seem to have magical timing, don’t they? I had been holding D on my lap and turned her around to go up onto my shoulder, when I noticed a damp sensation on my hand. Well that’s odd, I thought. Did she spit up or drool on me? Upon further inspection, I realized it was neither of the above options. Rather, a tell-tale yellowish stain began creeping its way across the back of her onesie. Oh no! Is that what I think it is? Yep, it’s what I thought it was. Poop.

 

Quick, let’s get her changed before it gets worse. Ha. Ha ha. HAHAHAHA! Nice try. Before I knew it (and of course before i could get her into the room we were using as the changing area), there was bright yellow breastfed baby poop engulfing my sweet baby girl. Up her entire back, out through the leg holes of the diaper, all around to the front of the onesie, on her legs, on her socks, in her socks, on her arms (what? yeah, i don’t know either). POOPSPLOSION!!

 

Needless to say, tiny little D went right into the sink for a nice warm bath, poopsplosion clothes and all. Don’t worry, she was quickly separated from the mess and given a new, clean bathing vessel, but we just wanted to try to contain the monster as soon as possible before the poopsplosion could claim any more victims. And thus, dear readers, began our lives with a new word – poopsplosion. I’d love to say that we and the poopsplosions parted ways after those newborn and breastfed months, but not even close. In fact, we’ve had a couple encounters as recently as this week. There is a very good reason we have to keep a spare outfit on hand at daycare. Twice this week D came home in different clothes. And you know what that means… More poopsplosions and more laundry. Hooray!! (insert much sarcasm here)

 

So there you have it. Our first (of MANY!) really messy moment with a baby, and our introduction to a new vocab word all rolled into one. Lucky us! And now I’m curious – what about you? Have any messy moments that stand out in your memories? In my experience, the poopier, the funnier!

 

 

I received information about Clorox’s Bleach It Away campaign and am sharing my messy moment for the chance to win prizes from The SITS Girls. To learn more about the messy moment program, check out www.BleachItAway.com.  Sharing your story on the Clorox fan page gets you entered for the chance to win $25,000 and daily prizes, and you can grab a coupon for Clorox® Regular Bleach.

 

I’m also linking this up with Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop.