Fall Ball Champs!

Morrison’s Minors team won the Fall Ball playoffs! I couldn’t believe it! He was on the Dodgers this fall after starting his Little League career on the Marauders in Pee Wees this spring/summer.

Minors started off so much different than Pee Wees, it was almost disheartening. Kids on the team made fun of his stuff, the coaches were far less engaged than the ones in Pee Wees were, and I was afraid it was going to turn him off from baseball completely. I came to find out this unfortunately isn’t unusual in Minors so it wasn’t just Morrison, but that’s still stupid – it’s kids’ baseball! But in typical Morrison fashion, his kind heart and sweet attitude triumphed and he did awesome. When he told me about the dumb comments, I told him how sorry I was that it happened and that generally when kids make fun of other kids, it’s because they’re actually jealous so don’t even listen to them. And that turned out to ring so true. He said he didn’t let their comments bother him, he just ignored them and focused on the game, and all he wanted was to have fun. I about cried when he said that, because that was all him. A heart of gold and spirit of pure joy this one has, and my pride is endless.

He is SUCH a natural athlete, it’s incredible. His Pee Wees coach said he was by far the most improved from the beginning of that season to the end on their team, and he just kept getting better and better this fall. His confidence was through the roof, and when his teammates realized that the new kid was ready to kick their butts, they quickly shut the F up. Go Morrison!

So that was a fun and very unexpected end to his first Fall Ball season. The playoffs were a one-day, three one-hour-games event. They won their first one and I was like oh fun, we’ll just stay up here and I’ll get him a cheeseburger for lunch from the ballpark grill (which he’d been wanting all year!), then we’ll see what happens in game #2. Then they won that one, too! By this time I saw his Pee Wees coach and told him how they were doing and he came over to cheer Morrison on during his at bat, which totally made Morrison’s day. Then they tapped a keg of local beer for all the parents, so that was awesome, too. And then they won the second game! I was giving Ryan the play-by-play the whole time, and he got too superstitious so said he’d better not come up to the park so he didn’t jinx it. But by the end of game #3, when it looked like they might actually win the thing, he hopped on his ebike and got up there as fast as he could. He arrived just in time to see them win it all! I don’t think we’ve ever seen Morrison smile so big and so hard. They got medals, they got ice cream, and his young life was made.

This kid fills my heart, and everyone who knows him can feel the happiness he carries through life. Great job, my love! We are SO proud of you and can’t wait to see the greatness that lies ahead of you on the baseball field and off.

These days

These days are full of burp rags and 2 a.m. feedings; diaper after diaper after diaper and tiny baby snuggles.

Watching them take in this whole new world with wide, innocent, beautiful eyes. Something new to them every day, each piece filling my heart more and more.

These days are full of wiping 3-year-old buns and filling milk cups; taking breakfast and lunch orders and cleaning off hands and faces.

Figuring out when to let them try it and when to keep doing it myself. Knowing they want to learn and grow but selfishly wanting them to stay my babies forever. Trying to raise them to be good, kind, strong adults while making sure they live childhood fully.

I tell them constantly – enjoy every single day and year as a kid, because once you’re a grownup, you’re a grownup for the rest of your life. Being a kid is so much more fun!

These days are full of “Mama, watch me,” and “Mama, know what?” and “Mama, can I have that?” and “Mama,” “Mama,” “Mama.”

And I try to answer each and every one, because I know someday I’ll hear it no more.

These days are full of giving back pacifiers and rubbing tiny noses, soothing and calming just by being near.

These days are full of onesies and strollers and bikes and dolls and toys and imagination and creation and fun. Even the really, really long days. Start over in the morning, look back, and I can always see the fun. They’re kids. They do.

These days are full of laundry and messes and cleaning and laundry and messes and cleaning. But they’re mine, and I get to do them. I don’t have to wait until after work or on the weekend.

These days are full of one more kiss when I go to bed. They’re always deep in sleep and smell warm. Like these long summer days of play.

These days are rarely my own and are almost completely for these 5 incredible, magical, wonderful little faces. But that alone makes me ridiculously happy.

 




They have arrived!

The twins are here! Well, they were here over a month ago now, but you know very well how this blog works. Something happens, I want to write all about it, then I finally get a chance to do so anywhere from 1 to 6+ months later. I hate that it works that way because I remember the days when everything I put on here was much more timely, even daily, but that just isn’t how life works around here anymore. C’est la vie.

But I can’t let another day go by without formally introducing you to our 4th and 5th (and final!!) babies, so here we go…

Since I was pregnant with twins and incredibly old to be having babies (once you hit 35 you’re considered advanced maternal age, and your pregnancy is labeled geriatric. no joke. they really know how to make a girl feel good.), my OB didn’t want me going much past 37 weeks before delivery and definitely not past 38 weeks. So we set an induction date of Wednesday, January 31. This broke the tradition of all of our children being born on Sundays, but the date did end in a 1 like the birth dates of all the others (Della = 1, Lana = 21, Morrison = 31).

It was also a good date because it was a super blue blood moon – a supermoon, a blue moon, and a total lunar eclipse all at the same time. This cool phenomenon hadn’t occurred for over 150 years before then, so I’d say that makes these little guys pretty damn special.

I was scheduled for 8:30 that morning, so my mom came up the day before to get settled in for this, I made sure the girls had rides to and from school for that day and the rest of the week just in case Ryan wasn’t able to do it, and Ryan and I headed to the hospital shortly after 8:00.

We got checked in and settled into our delivery room for the day, and things got started. And then they stopped and we waited. And waited some more. The anesthesiologist who was going to come in to do my epidural was apparently having a busy morning, and I was obviously low on the priority list, thanks a lot. He finally came in and started to set up his little table, but then he got a phone call, said he had to take it, and left the room. Wtf, dude? I looked at the nurse like what the hell is he doing, and she apologized, saying he really is not supposed to do that at all. So she went out to find him, and Ryan and I sat waiting again.

When she came back, she said she had discovered he was dealing with a family emergency that day, so ok fine, we cut him some slack. I finally got the epidural in shortly before 11:00, and thankfully that went smoothly. I never got one with the first 3 kids, because I’d heard horror stories of the needle and it getting messed up in your back. And I really enjoy being able to walk, so I didn’t want anyone screwing around with my spine. But having to deliver 2 babies in a row sounded horrible, so there was no way I was going without one this time around. The giant needle containing the numbing medication hurt like hell, but once that was done he got the catheter in and the real medicine pumping through, and I had none of the immediate side effects he warned might occur, so we were all set.

Ryan and I started watching Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee on his computer and just waited for the pitocin to get labor going. I’d had so many Braxton Hicks contractions in the months leading up to then that I assumed I’d be at least 2-3 cm dilated by that morning. However, when they checked me after I’d gotten all hooked up in the bed, they found I was only 1.5 cm dilated and not effaced at all, so we were basically starting from scratch with zero labor signs. Awesome. There went my hopes of getting these little guys out by early afternoon.

Things were going boringly, yet fortunately pain-free thanks to that massive needle that had been shoved in my back hours earlier, when I got uncomfortable and wanted to shift positions. I was afraid of knocking the catheter out of place in my back, so the nurse helped me roll more to my right side and sit up just a little. Then I started to feel kind of funny, then really bad, then things took a turn for the worse. My blood pressure plummeted to 50/29, my heart rate dropped sharply, one of the babies’ heart rates dropped too, and I passed out and started throwing up the juice the nurse had given me at first to try to bring my blood sugar up. Ryan said my eyes rolled back and my legs jerked out straight, so he thought I was having a seizure. It wasn’t, it was the blood pressure drop that was a bad reaction to the epidural, but the nurse hit the OB team button, a bunch of people came rushing in, the new anesthesiologist jammed a needle full of something into my IV bag, and I came right back. As soon as I opened my eyes, I felt a million times better and found out what happened. To me, it just felt like I needed to go to sleep and closed my eyes. I missed all the action.

So I stayed lying down for the rest of the day, and we continued our waiting game and show watching. They broke my water mid-afternoon, let’s say around 2:00, and then I expected things to really pick up as they had with the other 3. Nope. More waiting. I finally started to feel some real discomfort and almost pain a couple hours later, after watching some contractions go off the chart and not feeling a thing. I really didn’t believe the epidural was truly going to work until I realized those mountains on the printout were massive contractions and I had felt nothing the entire time. So anyway, when I told the nurse I was feeling a lot of pressure and kind of some pain, she checked me and it was time for babies! Wahoo, finally! But holy shit did I get scared then.

They had to wheel me into the operating room, and my heart rate was probably through the roof. I was so nervous! Yes, I’d given birth before and all went smoothly, but this was a whole new ballgame. Two at once?? Plus after the bad reaction I’d had earlier in the day I really had no idea what was about to happen. We had to be in the operating room because with twins, the NICU team is automatically in there to immediately take care of the babies when they come out, just in case. Plus there was my OB, the med student (resident? whatever he was called), the anesthesiologist to monitor the epidural and turn it off as soon as I was done, and all the nurses (thank god for those nurses! they are saints). So they covered my hair, made Ryan get in his bunny suit/hair cover/and booties, and we set off down the hallway.

When we got into the OR they made me shift from the bed I’d been in all day to a tiny, hard slab of a bed that I swear was about an inch wide, and I knew that was going to be a bad idea. My hands had gotten so swollen and painful from the carpal tunnel and all the fluid they pumped into me by the end of the day that I was practically in tears by the time of delivery because they hurt so badly. Both Ryan and our main nurse took turns trying to massage them and applying heat packs. So my hands were inflamed and useless, yet they wanted me to push myself up and over onto this other bed. Not a chance. So I had to alternate wriggling my lower half and hauling my upper half with my elbows to move myself, which made my stomach churn into knots. Wonderful. By the time I was fully on the miniature OR table, I was ready to throw up again. And again and again and again. That was miserable. I was afraid I’d be barfing and pushing out a baby at the same time. Disgusting.

Poor Ryan got the glamorous job of holding my puke pan, and his services were needed again when they made me move down to the end of the OR bed. Why didn’t you just make me go there in the first place? But I got that all out of my system before it was time to push, thank heavens. Since I couldn’t feel any of the contractions whatsoever, I told them they were going to have to tell me when to push and get these little ones moving. So they did. And after just a couple rounds, Baby A came screaming into the world. He was Nat Jennings Rau, born at 5:02 pm, weighing 6 lbs. 3.5 oz. and measuring 18″ long.

10 minutes and a few more pushes later, Baby B made his appearance. He was born sunny-side up and, as such, swallowed a bunch of amniotic fluid on his way out, so it took a minute to get him going and crying when he came out. But once they made sure he was ok, we met Avit Jerome Rau, born at 5:12 pm, weighing 6 lbs. 0 oz. and measuring 19″ long.

Perfection.

A very happy, relieved ending to what for me was a long, painful, fear-inducing journey. I was elated to be done being pregnant, since this one caused me the most pain and discomfort by far. The heartburn was more severe, the carpal tunnel pain was excruciating, and the 48-pound weight gain was about a dozen pounds more than I’d gained with any of the other 3. It was the first time I actually could not see parts of my body, putting on and taking off socks was a nightmarish circus act, and every physical act made me feel like I was about 120 years old. Plus the absolute unknown of birthing and raising twins shadowed the entire pregnancy for me, so much more so than any excitement of getting to meet 2 more brand new little people. But once they were in my arms, I was thrilled to welcome them into our family. I still can’t believe we brought 2 babies home this time!

(i cannot get that picture of Ryan rotated correctly to save my life, so sorry)

So there it is. The final birth story for this family. Of 7. What?!?! That still sounds unreal, and I’m sure it will for a long time. Never ever ever did I envision having 5 children, nor did I ever want to have 5 children. But now that we do, it is pretty amazing to say that my body carried and birthed 5 beautiful, healthy babies, all of whom are currently thriving and happy.

The big siblings came to the hospital to meet the babies on Thursday after Della got done with school, and they were all instantly in love. Actually, they were more interested in playing in the big hospital room that I got for my recovery stay and getting food, but you know, they still love the twins.

(can’t get Nigh-Night rotated either, dumb blog)

We went home mid-day on Friday, after both the twins and I cleared all our checks for discharge. My mom stayed with us through that weekend, then Ryan had 2 weeks off work, which was amazing. We all got to take naps every day, and I was able to sleep in until just before the girls got off to school, so that extra sleep that I didn’t have in the early days with the other kids was a lifesaver. Then my mom came back up for a week after Ryan went back to work, yet another lifesaver. Friends and neighbors have also been massive helps, bringing meals and giving the girls rides to and from school. Simply not having to leave the house with all these children has been a tremendous sanity saver for me. The twins still have no morning schedule to speak of and nights continue to be iffy, so if I had to try to get all 6 of us ready to get out the door by 7:45 each school morning, I’d probably be out of my mind by now.

Yes, it’s hard work with the countless diaper changes daily and feeling like I spend fully half my time stuck under a feeding infant or 2, plus taking care of 3 other kids, one of whom is in the thick of potty training right now. And yes, I’m exhausted. But I’m really, truly happy. I thought having twins would be the worst thing to happen to our family, but I could not have been more wrong. These spectacular little faces make it all worth it.

Welcome home, little Nat and Avit! We all love you oh, so much!

 

 




2018

So here’s 2018 in a nutshell – we’re having twin boys in 3 weeks. !?!?!

That’s also the reason my second half of 2017 posting was even less frequent than normal by my terrible posting standards. I wanted to tell you all about our summer and the trips we took. I wanted to tell you all about our holidays. I wanted to show you pictures of everything. However, growing and trying to get our house and family ready for 2 babies at once has proven more exhausting than I expected, so unfortunately this blog got pushed waaaaaay down on the priority list.

I’m really hoping it won’t get lost all together once the babies are born, but I’m definitely not promising an increase in posts. Hopefully I’ll be able to get some pictures up, though, so you can all see these little guys.

Here are a couple pictures, though. This was our New Year’s Eve family photo, plus a silly one. Will they be our last ones together before we’re a family of 7?? Stay tuned and bear with me…

 




Buddies

This was my view on the walk to school this morning, and it made me so very, very happy.

All day yesterday, Morrison insisted on loading up his little dinosaur backpack and toting it around the house like he was going to school like his big sisters. Then this morning, when the girls got their backpacks ready for school, his was right there in the mix. So Della hung it on the stroller hook with theirs, and off we went.

He had a couple dinosaurs and books in there, so I stuck it in his lap because it was too heavy to carry on the backpack hook. He held tight to it the whole way, and it was the cutest thing. After a little while, Lana started helping him take books out and “read” them. First she helped him spell his name out loud, and then she’d say, “Now you try.” I about melted! Then they went through the little collection of books, and Morrison was in 7th heaven.

I absolutely love watching the bonds between these kids grow stronger every day. They love playing with, teaching, and learning from each other. Prime example, when we got home from dropping the girls off, Morrison set this up on the arm of the couch, exactly like Lana has. They amaze me constantly and make every day that much better.

 




1st grade

Della started 1st grade today, and I missed her the second she walked through those doors to begin this new school year.

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I miss her like crazy every time she goes to school, but I know she’s going to have a wonderful year again. After meeting her teacher, Mrs. Tauscher, the other night at meet and greet, she is dying to get started on their classroom travel adventures and getting her passport stamped.

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One of her good little girlfriends from K5 is in her class again this year and they’re even sitting at the same table, so Della is very happy about that.

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I hate it when these giant chunks of my heart leave me to walk around in this big, wide world all by themselves, but at least I can rest a little easier knowing she’s in such good hands at this school. I just pray that it forever stays the safe haven it has always been for her and all the other kids there.

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Good luck this year, sweet pea! 1st grade looks beautiful on you! (feel free to slow down on this growing up thing any time, though…)

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Summer vacation!

School’s out, school’s out! The night before the last day of K5…

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Della has been out of school for a week and a half now, and it has been so great! I absolutely adore having all 3 of these munchkins with me all day again, and it’s so much fun to see especially how Della entertains herself all day. I got her a summer workbook for kids going from K5 to 1st grade and she loves it. She’s also already made her K5 teacher, Mrs. Murphy, a card and a couple pictures that we mailed her last week. Seeing how much she grew and thrived this past school year was incredible, and I’m so excited to watch her passion for learning continue in the years ahead. Can you even believe how big she’s getting??

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We started off this summer vacation with a bang, too. On the very first day off last week we went for a run (Della’s first one joining us on her bike this season), went to the library to sign all 3 up for the summer reading program (yes, even morrison gets to participate in the read-to-me part and get a free book at the end), walked over to check out and throw wish pennies into the fountain, and the girls had a picnic lunch in the backyard.

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Since then, we’ve been to the zoo, Bookworm Gardens, playing in the sprinkler, and generally enjoying days without too many schedules.

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The summer weather is in full swing, so the kids are always outside playing with their friends. And the parents are out together having a glass of wine or a beer, so it’s a win-win. I love summer and am thoroughly embracing every single day of this one!

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