Family – Page 2 – Jocelyn Rau

May 6, 2021

April 8

Was a big day around here. The big 3 went back to in-person school for the first time in 174 school days, and it was mine and Ryan’s 15th anniversary.

Last day of virtual school for this crew!

Last virtual day picture with her teacher.

The kids are so happy to be back in the classrooms with their teachers and friends, and so am I! We were elated that Della and Morrison’s teachers switched back to in person, too, so they got to stay with them. Lana’s virtual teacher actually didn’t keep her own classroom this quarter so Lana wouldn’t have been able to stay with her anyway, and Lana’s new teacher seems wonderful. Plus, her virtual teacher now helps out with reading groups in Morrison’s class and Lana gets to see her for an hour each Wednesday during asynchronous office hours, so that worked out great. As much as I miss not having them here all day anymore, I feel with every fiber of my being that sending them back for this final quarter of the school year was definitely the right choice for us. Even the walking to/from school routine feels good again. We’ve still had asynchronous Wednesdays, so I do get to keep them with me those days.

They hopped right back into the school swing, too. They unload their backpacks right when we get home, wash their lunch boxes and water bottles, do any homework (usually only Della), give me any papers out of their folders (usually only Lana and Morrison), then make their lunches and snacks for the next day after dinner. I absolutely love the independence they’ve gained in these chores. They enjoy making their own lunches and I don’t, so it’s a win-win!

First morning walking to school in over a year!

We didn’t have a big celebration for #15. Ryan sent me a beautiful flower arrangement, I hung up the decorations Lana had made for Valentine’s Day that we were saving for this, and I opened a nice bottle of sparkling wine before dinner. I put on my wedding dress, too, which Avit absolutely loved helping to arrange.

Lana’s anniversary present for us. She made it immediately when we got home from school and had me send a picture of it to her teacher. 🙂 It says “Here comes the bride all dressed in white.”

I say it pretty much every spring, but I can’t believe we’re in May already and nearing the end of yet another school year. Della and I had her middle school tour last night (what the?!?!?!). I will be a total mess the last week of this school year with all the fun activities and celebrations they have planned for the 5th graders’ sendoff from elementary school. Even though the middle school looks incredible and I know she’ll love it, it’s breaking my heart that we’re not all going to be walking to and from the same school together each day anymore, and she won’t be at the same school with any of her siblings again until her senior year of high school. I know these are all just steps in life, but they’re scary for me. I know my kids little, and I love it this way. I obviously won’t love them any less as they grow up, but I’m having a really hard time letting go.

So there we go. April 8 – it was a good day.

December 7, 2020December 31, 2020

Roaring ’20

2020, man. What the fuck happened??

The year started off so great: A new decade! So exciting! So hopeful! The next 10 years! Remember?

That train went off the rails pretty quickly, eh?

A global pandemic that’s killing millions. Mother Nature hating humankind – raging wildfires, a million hurricanes and tropical storms, floods, blizzards. Murder hornets. Swarming locusts. Economies on destructive roller coasters. Widespread unemployment and shuttered businesses. The bastard racism alive and well. Nationwide protests. An election that tested the foundation of this country and shook us to our core. Holidays spent mostly apart from family and friends physically but connected electronically. Social distancing. Zoom. Virtual. Synchronous. Asynchronous. Wear a mask! A new normal.

Safer at home and lockdown last spring were actually not that bad. As I’ve said time and again, being home and not having to load all 5 up to go anywhere is my specialty. The big 3 did great with virtual school during that time and got a couple chances to connect with their teachers again by the end of the school year, even though we weren’t in classrooms anymore.

{If you’d like a little year-end review of those posts, here’s what happened during weeks 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, and post.}

However.

As summer vacation rolled in and our normally relaxed, unscheduled days dawned, the coziness of all 7 of us being at home together got a little less cozy by the hour.

If I heard, “I’m on a call!” once more… If the boys ran through the house at top speed and crashed into something or each other once more… If the girls bickered over who went first for whatever or got to control the remote to watch whatever or just whatever whatever once more…

As a normally very even-keeled person, experiencing a constant, humongous range of emotions became exhausting. Happy! Crabby! Chilled out! Angry! Elated! Enraged! Loving! Crying! Laughing! I lost my shit more times than I have in my entire adult life before March of this year, and I began questioning things that I held as rock solid in every aspect before the stretch of time that was 2020. I honestly don’t know how I didn’t kill 1 or more of us daily.

Actually, wine. It was probably wine that saved all of our lives.

I kid. Kind of.

I had also planned to finally take all 5 kids to Canada with my mom and sisters for a vacation this summer, but obviously that didn’t happen with the border closure. We did take a couple of shorter trips within the Midwest, though, so those helped to get the ants out of our pants a little. And then Ryan went back to work in his building in August, and we started to slide back to a slightly reduced level of insanity. And rage on my end, I won’t lie.

As you know, when school started again in September we chose to keep the big 3 fully virtual. With the success they’d had at home last spring and the complete uncertainty of how everything was going to play out with in-person schooling and the spread of covid-19, we felt it was right for us. Fortunately it’s worked out great so far, with each grade having enough students choose fully virtual that each of their classes has a dedicated fully virtual teacher, not splitting her time between those students in class and those on screen. And again, that not having to get everyone out the door at a certain time each morning thing… I’ve gotten very used to it! We get to choose virtual/in person by quarter, and I think we’re going to stick with fully virtual all year. The kids all love their teachers, as do I; they’re doing an excellent job; and they haven’t missed a beat instruction-wise or socially.

And now here we are, the calendar about to flip yet again. The kids and I did get a little in-person family time before Christmas, and the rest of this holiday season we enjoyed here at home, the 7 of us together. I definitely don’t have the same excitement going into 2021 as I did coming into 2020, but I do have a take-it-as-it-comes attitude. I think that’s what 2020 taught us; well, me, at least – you have absolutely no idea what’s heading at you next, so take it as it comes as best you can. I count my blessings daily (literally, believe me!) that we all have our health, Ryan still has his job, I am still able to be home full time with the kids, the roof over our heads is still standing, and we can put food on our table.

(*click on each image in the gallery to enlarge it*)

So, 2021, here we come. 2020, you can fuck off. We survived you, and we’re thankfully still going. As my grandma says, “Cherish the days. March on.” That, and I just restocked the wine cellar.

November 19, 2020

Up North, annual #3

We took our third annual fall trip up to Eagle River last week, and it was another fun one. It didn’t seem quite as fun to me as the past 2, but looking back as a whole, I’m so glad we went again.

I’m not sure why the difference, but I think a lot of it had to do with the big 3 doing school up there. Lana and Morrison didn’t log onto their live meetings and Della was only on hers for 2 out of the 3 synchronous school days we were there, but they did still keep up with all their posted lessons on their own so they didn’t get behind. So that was a big chunk of their days. A prime example of the mobility of virtual school being both a blessing and a curse. 😉

Also, the pool at the resort was closed due to COVID-19 this year and they didn’t think the pool at the other resort that we used last year was quite up to standards, so we didn’t even bother taking swim suits. That was always a highlight of the time for the kids, so that was missing this year, too.

However, there were plenty of great times. Ryan took the big 3 on 2 cool hikes; I took the twins on walks around the resort grounds, which they loved; the deer friends were out in force this year, which we did miss last year; we had fires daily, which I loved; I played a number of fun games with our friends; and the wine was good and plenitful, a vacation must. We got a couple dustings of snow again, too, which make everything look and feel so festive.

So all in all, a successful trip #3 to Eagle River. We stayed in a different building than our previous visits that was right across from the playground and at the end of the little bay the resort is on, which was a setting I liked so much better than the other building we’ve stayed in.

Another big thank you to our friends who are our connection to this place – we’re already looking forward to trip #4 next year!

August 31, 2020August 31, 2020

#summervacation2020

Despite living during a pandemic, we managed to have a really great summer vacation. Screw you, COVID-19!

We started things off with a family trip over to Paw Paw, MI, for a nice 4-day weekend with my mom and stepdad. We’d never been to their cabin there before, and it was wonderful. (P.S. All of these trips will have their own gallery since we take millions of pictures, so please click on each pic to enlarge it if you’d like a better view.)

Two weeks later, my dad came up for the weekend to celebrate Morrison’s birthday, so it was fun having Grandpa in town for a few days. (Please see Morrison’s 5-year post for those pictures!) We were home for a few weeks after that, then I took the kids down to my mom’s for a week after the 4th of July. My sister and her kids drove back to spend that time, too, so we all had a great visit and got to celebrate my niece and stepdad’s birthdays. We hadn’t seem them for exactly a year, which is crazy!

A quick half week later, and we went on another family vacation. That never happens twice in a summer, so it was awesome. Our great friends found a last-minute rental opportunity about 3.5 hours north of here in Crandon, WI, so I said count us in! We definitely did not regret it. It was an incredible place with a perfect property and lake for the kids, and we all had so much fun.

A couple weeks after that, I took the kids back down to my mom’s for another week of Grandma and Grandpa days. We were the only visitors this time, and we celebrated Della’s birthday. Another round of relaxation and fun – just what we needed!

I’m in love with these clutch purses and mini pouches I’ve discovered how to make!

We also sprinkled in a couple treat days around here – Bookworm Gardens, hunting for sea glass, donuts and the playground at school, backyard fun (we finally have grass!), the zoo, and I transformed our front porch into a perfect little sitting spot that I love.

So now we prepare for the start to our strangest school year ever. We’ve chosen to have the big 3 attend school fully virtually for the first quarter, because I can’t bring myself to make them the guinea pigs in all this. Our other option was a blended model where students go in person 2 days a week and virtual the other 3, but I’ll see how that works before sending ours in. If everyone stays healthy and school stays open the whole time, we’ll all be happy to send them back to the classrooms with their teachers and friends. But I’m just not convinced it will all work so smoothly right away. I want them back as much as they want to be back, but I also don’t need to take any unnecessary risks. Plus we don’t have an extra room for quarantining!

So, another summer break in the books. And an excellent one at that, even with masks, social distancing, and basically nothing operating like a usual summer. Who knows what these upcoming seasons will bring on all fronts, so I will cherish these last couple days like nobody’s business. Cheers!

December 31, 2019

2020 ~ The next 10…

It didn’t dawn on me until just a couple weeks ago that ringing in 2020 will not only start a new year but a whole new decade. What?! For some reason, that struck me hard. Woah, a new decade! It sounds so… big.

So then I started reflecting, something I rarely have time to do. The 2010s were pretty significant for me:

I started them at 30 years old; I’m ending them at 40.
I started them pregnant with our first child; I’m ending them with my pregnancies behind me.
We started them with 0 kids; we’re ending them with 5.
I started them having no clue what it meant to be a parent; I’m ending them as a pretty confident one.
I started them thinking having kids meant simply adding a baby to your family; I’m ending them knowing exactly how life changing having kids is. You’d better be prepared.
I started them working full time in the world of Wall St.; I’m ending them not working full time again for quite awhile, possibly ever. And definitely not in that arena; once I have the need/desire/time to go back to more time-consuming work, I will be looking for more freelance opportunities in my current editing field.
I started them putting myself first in pretty much all of my endeavors; I’m ending them knowing how to put others’ needs first constantly, namely those of 5 very small humans who live in my house. This past decade was definitely a lesson in selflessness and humility. Having kids can do that to a body.
This blog didn’t even exist in 2010; now it’s 9 years in.

So. Our family is complete. Our house is nearing completion (that’s been over a decade-long project!). We are all healthy. And I’m happy. Simple joys, but ones that are important to me.

Looking into the 2020s, I do have some feelings. And I say feelings, not goals, because that’s not how I roll. I don’t set tangible, hard goals or deadlines. I live by how things feel. It’s much easier.

I feel like getting to do some traveling with our brood. Doesn’t need to be elaborate or far, just exploring and seeing new places with the kids is fun.
I feel like getting to know our kids as growing individuals will be great. I spent the last decade, the whole of my 30s, having babies; now I’ll spend this one raising them. Hopefully I’ll do it right and they’ll be good people, assets to humanity, not a bunch of little turds.
I feel like these will be years of doing – finishing our house, enjoying where we live, watching the kids grow and thrive, living life as a big family.
I feel like getting to do some things my way, not just doing everything as governed by a baby. Or two.

2020. It sounds so futuristic, yet it’s here. The 1920s are the one era I always say I’d love to go back to if I ever got to time travel. Will the 2020s be my roaring ’20s?! Thank you, 2010s, for all you gave us. Now cheers to 2020 and the next new decade!

December 17, 2019

#thankful

The kids and I spent another wonderful Thanksgiving break with my family in Illinois this year, and every day I remembered exactly how thankful I am for what we have.

The week started out less than stellar with 2 heads full of lice (uggghhh!!!!) on Monday, $500 unexpectedly spent in treatment for that, then getting rear ended on the highway Tuesday night on the way down to my mom’s house to begin our trip (thankfully no damage or injury!), but fortunately that was the worst of it. Each day after that was great.

I have always known how important family is. You only get one, whether you like it or not. And I am very thankful for the one I have. It was so much fun watching my kids play and have fun with my family just as I did when I was their age. The circle of life!

#familyiseverything #thankful

December 16, 2019

Up Nort’, annual #2

Last month we took our second annual trip up to Eagle River with friends, just like last November. In fact, I just reread that post (click right here!), and this trip was much the same. I’ll highlight 2 main differences: This year we saw hardly any deer – quite the switch from last year, where we had to drive well under highway speeds for about the last hour of the 4-hour drive up so we didn’t slam into one, and where they came up to the patio door of our condo daily. Secondly, the pool at our place was closed for repairs during our stay this time, so thankfully they paid the fee for us to use the pool at another hotel about 10 miles away. That saved the vacation for the kids, ha!

Once again, it was a fun 4 days with good friends, good food, good wine, a fireplace, and some good family relaxing time. I might even check into the availability up there for next summer. The rates are much higher, but we’re familiar with the place now, we know that it’ll hold all of us (for now!), and their summer activities sound great. We shall see. Either way, a happy Fall tradition has begun. Hopefully it continues for many years!