To-NOT-Do List

When preparing to fly across the country with 1 small and 1 slightly bigger toddler, here is a list of possible scenarios:

  • Get a head cold.
  • Pass said head cold onto both toddlers.
  • Toddler 1 becomes so snot-filled that she does not sleep for 3 nights and counting.
  • Toddler 2 becomes so snot-filled that she coughs herself to vomiting the night before you plan to go out of town.
  • Toddler 1 blows through a box and a half of Kleenex, making it really difficult to pack a small suitcase with all that tissue needed.
  • Toddler 2 knows to keep a spare Kleenex in her sleeve in case she doesn’t have pockets, but that ends up just stuffing her sleeves with snot-ridden goo balls.
  • Try to pack for all 3 of you while stopping every 14 seconds to wipe Toddler 1’s nose.
  • Figure out into which suitcase the giant bag of medicine that is now needed will fit.
  • Stay sane in your zombie-like state.

Now, guess which of the above applies to me today.

All of them. Hooray!

And Ryan’s not coming.

Thankfully the girls and I are traveling with my mom and step-dad, so that will be an enormous help. And despite the hassle I feel getting ready here, I know it will end up being a wonderful trip. We’re going out to sunny Tucson for one of my cousin’s wedding, and it will be great to get out of this cold-again weather and spend a couple days with family.

But talk about terrible timing for all this shit, as usual.

So wish us safe travels! And sleep.