I want to run

The changes are big, bigger than I even expected.

I’m left alone, and it makes me nervous.

Feeling crushingly overwhelmed, actually.

I don’t know this feeling, and I don’t particularly like it.

It’s not my friend. It doesn’t suit me.

I wear confidence and happiness much, much better.

It makes me want to run, straight into the arms of something to which I’m better suited and truly enjoy.

But if I ran, would I make it?

Could life as we know it survive, be ok, and even grow?

Or would we stumble, fall, and ultimately fail?

Do I have the courage to risk it?

I don’t think so. No, not yet.

Do I want to? Absolutely.

Someday.

But perhaps not now.

Perhaps now isn’t the time, but it’s out there.

Waiting for me someday. Someday hopefully soon.

Not hopefully – it will be. Soon.

I will make it so.

But not yet.

I want to run, but I must be smart.

Know what I have and be thankful I have it. For now.

An opportunity? I can’t see it as that yet, but maybe.

Don’t run.

But I still want to…